Entry: WHEN WILL MY REFLECTION SHOW WHO I AM INSIDE? Saturday, October 17, 2009



All the time i think =)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The last 2 days have been relatively less busy compared to the last 2 weeks. i had little pockets of time to ruminate about life and every thought kept coming back to how thankful and blessed i am for everything and everyone that i have around me.

It seems that in every situation that is meaningful to me, God has placed a strong prominent person for me to look up to and learn from. The attraction is mutual. i'd like to think that i'm contributing to these people's lives as much as they are to mine. So, i do take extra effort to care for them; not because i want them to continue giving me what they have been giving, but as a token of my appreciation for them always being there for me, even they might not realize how big of an impact they have on me.

i love them. i really do. and everytime i see them, i feel very grateful for their presence.

At work, i have someone who places me on the moral and ethical highway, forever reminding me of the struggles of people who uphold right. She trusts me with freedom at work and believes in my judgment. More importantly, she believes in me and my potential way beyond what i expect of myself. She never fails to remind me of my strengths and yet at the same time tells my weaknesses into my face. i appreciate her honesty very much. At the same time, regardless of her status, she comes to me to seek advice and exchange thoughts. We share our lives during lunches and keep each other going in times when we both feel insecure about right and wrong. We pray together, entrusting our hopes and plans in Him, and we are very grateful for our fellowship and sisterly bond even though we are at very different stages of life. i guess the fact that i appreciate most about our relationship is our ability to comfortably switch between roles of superior-subordinate, mentor-mentee, sisters in Christ, friends, and confidants. We intuitively realize the boundaries of each role and responsibly hold back when the other is in charge. Who says multiple relationships never work out? =)

At the studio, i have someone who brings out the most beautiful part of me in dance. He sees things in me that i can't and never fails to reaffirm my doubts. He allays any fear and insecurity of mine at being the most inexperienced dancer of the group. He also makes me feel as though i'm the most elegant creature on earth and that i can dance with everyone watching yet not have a care in the world. He makes time to answer my endless inquisitions and patiently waits while i unload my befuddled thoughts upon him. At the same time, he is willing to listen and accept my lowly opinion about his own dance (and he has been dancing for 10 years!). He also readily acknowledges his weaknesses in front of me, and i really appreciate his courage and trust in me for that. Thought he has been dancing for so long, he never stops thinking and relearning each basic step as though it was his first. i don't think he knows how much he inspires me in dance =) We share our lives too, our thoughts about life, our joys and fears, and i guess that's what cements the trust between us in and outside of the dance floor. Again, we play multiple roles, teacher-student, teacher-teaching assistant, partners, friends, yet they all work out fine.

i guess i will always be amazed at how love and respect can overcome situations which 'can never work out'. i think there is a catch though; that one needs to learn and earn enough maturity to be able to receive such insights. With that insight then comes the pure joy and happiness that awaits beyond the obstacles of clearly drawn yet imaginary lines which we human place to protect ourselves, knowing not that they also hinder us from everything beyond that boundary.

...ok...i think i'm starting to sound shakespear-ean, so i shall leave it at that =)

 

 

   0 comments

Leave a Comment:

Name


Homepage (optional)


Comments